So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
