Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize