Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done