If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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