I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
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