dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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