you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
