while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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