Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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