omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize