I could have mohawked her pubes.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
