The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
you would pick up someone in the library
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
i believe in u and ur pee
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