I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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