marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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