Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
