you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
