Your mouth is God's brothel.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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