dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
