Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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