Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  ...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (480): ...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can. http://tfl.nu/7kew
  Replies (5) Good night (2469) Bad night (528) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him. http://tfl.nu/jd1k
  Replies (23) Good night (3113) Bad night (666) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto" http://tfl.nu/o359
  Replies (18) Good night (567) Bad night (4360) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help? http://tfl.nu/kek4
  Replies (8) Good night (1123) Bad night (2785) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement. http://tfl.nu/3cr8
  Replies (27) Good night (5656) Bad night (690)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva". http://tfl.nu/2q86
  Replies (25) Good night (4678) Bad night (1706) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him http://tfl.nu/i94e
  Replies (21) Good night (584) Bad night (5923) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea http://tfl.nu/o6ch
  Replies (28) Good night (1216) Bad night (3750) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad http://tfl.nu/i5ms
  Replies (30) Good night (843) Bad night (4285) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret http://tfl.nu/ksru
  Replies (53) Good night (1400) Bad night (2300) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly.... http://tfl.nu/m1mg
  Replies (6) Good night (1078) Bad night (1646) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend. http://tfl.nu/4mn4
  Replies (2) Good night (2063) Bad night (508) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world. (540): I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him. http://tfl.nu/0ulc
  Replies (6) Good night (566) Bad night (1521)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me. http://tfl.nu/rba0
  Replies (3) Good night (2102) Bad night (392) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (807): View more from Ontario

  We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (807): We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely. http://tfl.nu/t6rq
  Replies (2) Good night (177) Bad night (814)

Randomize