when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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