I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
