Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize