Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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