found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Ketchup is God's man juice
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
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