I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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