Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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