shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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