Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize