Capitaan dildo arrescate!
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Randomize
