We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
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