capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
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I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
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Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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