I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Are we still banned from the library?
This is the high leading the old right now
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
