My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize
