So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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