It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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