Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Randomize
