i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
