dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
