dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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