I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Oh god it's open bar.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
