he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
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apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
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They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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