I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
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