you're like a bully in the Christmas story
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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