yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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