Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
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