I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
