And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
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