I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
