Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
