your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
